


How To Scare Kylo Ren

by lynnkath08



Series: The First Order's Sweethearts [9]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Barney costume, Desk Sex, F/M, Office Sex, Poor Kylo Ren, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-07
Updated: 2017-02-07
Packaged: 2018-09-22 09:33:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9601904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lynnkath08/pseuds/lynnkath08
Summary: Kylo Ren walks in on Lieutenant Mitaka and his girlfriend Emily. What else is he afraid of?





	

Kylo Ren was walking down the halls of the _Finalizer_ until he spotted Lieutenant General May.

"Sky- I mean Lieutenant General May," Kylo said.

"Commander Ren," the feisty blonde responded.

"Your muffin, ma'am," Kylo said as he handed May a small paper bag.

"Thank you," May said as she took the bag.

"Where's General Hux?" Kylo asked.

"He's in his office," May responded.

"Thank you Lieutenant General," Kylo said, and May nodded then they went their separate ways.

Kylo kept on walking until he saw the door to General Hux's office, and knocked on the door.

"Enter," a male voice responded, and Kylo opened the door, revealing the tall ginger sitting at his desk looking at his datapad.

"General Hux," Kylo said.

Hux looked up from his datapad. "Ren," he responded.

"Your coffee, sir," Kylo said as he handed Hux the cup.

"Thank you," Hux said as he took the cup, taking a sip before putting it down.

"Is there anything else that you need?" Kylo asked.

"No just get the hell out of here," the ginger responded.

"Ok," Kylo said, then he left the General's office. _'I don't blame Reynolds for not liking Hux that much,'_ Kylo thought in his mind.

As Kylo was walking he noticed Chief Petty Officer Unamo walking towards him.

"Have you seen Lieutenant Mitaka? He left his hat at the dining hall, it was at the exact spot he sat during lunch time," the brunette female said as she held out a hat.

"I'm not sure, but I will go find him and return it to him," Kylo said as he held out his hand, and Unamo handed him the hat.

"Thank you," Unamo said, and Kylo nodded then walked off.

Kylo kept walking then he spotted the door to Lieutenant Mitaka's office. As he walked closer he heard moaning. He stopped and placed his ear at the door, and the moaning was louder, frightening Kylo. He knocked on the door, but there was no response. After waiting a couple minutes he knocked again, but still no response. The moaning just got louder. Kylo sighed and opened the door, revealing Lieutenant Mitaka and Lieutenant Reynolds having sex on Mitaka's desk, with their uniforms on the floor. Mitaka and Reynolds noticed Kylo's presence.

"Ren what are you doing here?! Get out!" Mitaka yelled as he did his best to hide his girlfriend.

"You left your hat at the dining hall so I'm returning it to you! You're welcome!" Kylo yelled as he threw Mitaka's hat at him, then shut the door and ran like a madman. "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" he screamed as he kept running. A few officers he passed gave him a "WTF" look. Hux and May stopped him.

"Ren would you like a present?" Hux asked.

"We have a very special surprise for you," May said.

"Yeah, sure. Ok," Kylo responded.

Hux turned over his shoulder and yelled, "You can come out now!"

Out of the dining hall came someone dressed in a Barney the Purple Dinosaur costume, frightening Kylo.

"I love you, you love me. We're a happy family," the person dressed as Barney sang.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! GET AWAY FROM ME!" Kylo screamed as he ran again, being chased by the person dressed as Barney.

"With a great big hug and a kiss from me to you. Won't you say you love me too," the person in the Barney costume sang as he hugged Kylo.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! GET OFF OF ME!" Kylo screamed, eventually getting out the person's embrace and running again.

A few of the officers and Stormtroopers laughed.

"Can I take this off now? It's too hot," the person dressed as Barney whined.

"Yeah go ahead," Hux responded.

The mask was then removed, revealing Petty Officer Thanisson. "Man, this thing was squeezing my brain," he said.

"You did a good job," Hux told him.

"Thanks," Thanisson said.

Mitaka and Reynolds suddenly showed up.

"What did I miss?" Mitaka asked.

"And why is Thanisson dressed as Barney?" Reynolds asked as she leaned her head on Mitaka's shoulder.

"Everybody has questions! Where the hell were you two?!" Hux asked as he crossed his arms.

"I was in my office, sir," Mitaka responded.

"Yes, we were in his office," Reynolds said.

"Were you guys snogging?" May asked.

"Hey you guys do it too!" Mitaka said defensively.

"True," Hux and May said at the same time.

"Yeah, Hux and May are worst. I hear them almost every night," Thanisson said.

"Lucky. Free ear porn for you," a Stormtrooper said.

"Hell no! It's disturbing!" Thanisson whined.

"Well, I'm just gonna be in my office," Hux said as he walked away.

"Me too, we'll have this conversation later," May said as she walked away as well.

"Yeah! What she said!" Hux yelled from over his shoulder.

"General Hux and Lieutenant General May? More like General Sexy and Lieutenant General Bae," the Stormtrooper said then walked away.

"Ok, this is awkward. See you guys later," Thanisson said as he walked away. The other officers and Stormtroopers walked away as well.

"So," Mitaka said as he looked at Reynolds.

"So," Reynolds repeated.

"Want to do this in the janitors closet?" Mitaka asked.

"Hell yeah!" Reynolds responded.

"No! Nobody is snogging anyone anywhere! I'm gonna have nightmares!" Kylo screamed as he ran past them.

"Kylo shut up!"


End file.
